New Punk: WOODBOOT + CUNTZ + Burlap + Exhaustion + Tommy T and the Classical Mishaps

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It’s been a while between drinking piss at the keyboard and talking shit about new punk bands in Aus, so here’s a little compilation for ya:

WOODBOOT – Nerd Holocaust etc.

WOODBOOT are essentially Brisbane’s version of Housewives. They’re loud, brash, and uncouth. How good is the word uncouth? Not as good as WOODBOOT.

After the very excellent offering that was last year’s ‘Krang Gang’, WOODBOOT dropped a surprise release on us that’s essentially Angry Samoans engaged in a wrestle to the death with GG Allin. Although they’ve only offered three tracks thus far, the songs of their upcoming ‘Crime Time’ album are furious, bloody spurts of bile sure to stir the loins of every individual who likes the sound of a guitar ploughing headfirst into oblivion. The songs are short…angry…as manic as the facial expressions of Nicholas Cage wrapped within a career-defining role. Delirious, offensive, completely fucked – that is the way of the WOODBOOT.

CUNTZ – Nah Man

“Nah Man” is my favourite phrase to use in real life. It’s a response you can use in any circumstance – “Do you like this?”, “Can you turn down the music”, “Sir, please put the gun down, and raise your hands in the air”. It’s also the new teeth-bared single from Melbourne’s CUNTZ, a power-stance growler that was built to get the kids jumping up and down. Bored, sardonic lyrics grunting underneath bruised and broken instruments – fucking winner.

Burlap – Good Boy 

Watching a Burlap show is like watching the Titanic sink. It’s majestic, terrifying, and you know that someone is going to die. Only real difference is that instead of somewhere near the Arctic, this dramatic episode takes place nestled between the comfortable bear claws of Blackwire HQ.

From within that safe embrace, Burlap have developed “Good Boy”, the first track off their upcoming debut album, due soon on TRAIT Records, who were responsible for that incredible MAKING record. “Good Boy” is a hit of what Burlap do best – grotesque, bombastic music, a hateful Glasgow smile that cackles as it slits your mind apart.

Apparently, Burlap are going to be bravely adventuring away from Parramatta Rd soon for a free show at the Newtown Social Club on the 19th of October.

Exhaustion – Phased Out

Exhaustion never do the same thing twice. If it wasn’t evident from the incredible improvised set they performed at the Opera House earlier this year, with Dutch saxophonist Kris Wanders, then a quick scan through their discography will make it blatantly obvious. Moving from screeching post-punk to morbid goth, twisting and subverting genre and emotion with frightening ease, Exhaustion are restless and prolific.

Their most recent output is “Phased Out”, a six minute exercise in looming, metallic punk. Like a tidal wave, Exhaustion rear their heads, crest and then destroy, flattening the Earth and its inhabitants with drowning, torturing noise. This experience dominates the soul for a few minutes, before retreating into a sullen, sinister murmur, allowing you to contemplate the horrifying lambast you just witnessed firsthand.

Tommy T and the Classical Mishaps – Perfection

Tommy T and the Classical Mishaps make prickly, paranoid soundbites that sound like Wire woke up with spiders laying eggs in their stomachs. An amalgamation of Melbourne’s finest (Dribble, Power etc.) Tommy T drool and cackle with two minutes of raving self-appraisal that feels like its being spouted from the mouth of a serial killer rather than a self-congratulating debutante.

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