Yard Duty are one of those precious bands that you stumble upon, and then cry in the realisation that you won’t fin anything as good in a long time. They’re the kind of band that makes you want to steal hair samples from the band and create voodoo dolls of them. That way if they break up, you can stick pins in them, and cause them infinite strife for the rest of their lives. I would never do such a thing..no that’s fucking weird. I’m more on the bludgeon ‘n’ haul-into-the-ominous-minivan type of guy. But hey, we’re not all perfect right?
Jokes aside, Yard Duty are fucking great. And better yet, they’re from Sydney! And better, better yet, they’ve just released their debut EP/album (I’m not sure, it’s nine tracks)! And by just released, I mean it was released roughly a couple weeks ago. Right now, I feel like every hipster in town should beat me to death with their 4th Edition copies of ‘THE BEST OF ALLEN GINSBERG’ for being behind the times. Deal with it, I’ve been studying and/or watching Breaking Bad. But now, the time has come to review the shit out of Yard Duty.
Almost every song on this record is pure slacker pop genius, in the vein of Guided By Voices, Full Ugly or Dick Diver. Man, that is a good fucking crowd to be heaped in with. But allow me to re-iterate, Yard Duty get to this point of being slacker proteges because they write really good songs. Some of them are funny as fuck such as ‘Downward Dog’, which is a skewed pop narrative about yoga and death. But shit goes onto another level entirely on ‘Vierboom’s Room’, a song about losing your virginity to an Asian girl you’ve known for a couple hours. Listening to this song is like listening to the best stand-up set you’ve ever heard, all to the tune of Parquet Court-ish strumming. Observational musings of where condoms can be located (under Clinton memorabilia), Ninja Turtle panties and vaginal warts. Oh yeah, and try getting ‘So I came on his bed!’ out of your head for the rest of the week.
Although ‘Vierboom’s Room’ is far and away the funniest and memorable track on ‘Mixed Business’, there’s still a bunch of other lo-fi beauties to be found. ‘Talk Radio’, a song that sounds like it’s being shouted through a hollowed out turtle’s asshole (a compliment, and also an accurate reflection on the subjects of ‘Talk Radio’), and then there’s also ‘Cost Benefit Analysis’, which has an arse-ripper of a chorus about, yep, fucking taxes. Finally, there is the other shining jewel in Yard Duty’s crown, ‘Something Better’, a track that is sure as shit to become a crowd favourite. It’s surprisingly heartfelt and personal, and the lack of comedic edge a la ‘Vierboom’s Room’ gives it an endearing tone that most bands couldn’t even replicate, let alone craft.
To summarise, Yard Duty have created an absolute kick-arse fantastic record. It is more addictive than Saturday Morning Cartoons. Every song on here has more heart than a heart surgeon, more charisma than ten Robin Williams, and is full of more bullshit than a cow. However, Yard Duty take this bullshit, chuck a glossy sheen of lo-fi brilliance over it, and turn it into ‘Mixed Business’ a fine, fine, fine fucking album/EP thing.
You can grab ‘Mixed Business’ for however much you want at Yard Duty’s Bandcamp right here. Yard Duty are playing the Hollywood Hotel tomorrow afternoon, Sunday 13th of October.